Anne Boleyn Bloody Revenge on Old King Harry…..

Anne Boleyn wakes up damp and cold. She quickly deduces that she is in her grave. To her ire she realizes that a shallow grave in the burial grounds of the Chapel of St. Peter ad Vincula, (a stone’s throw from the Tower of London) is her final testing place. The Queen is angry. Not only had a last minute decision caused her to be hanged rather than beheaded, she was buried in an unmarked grave as if she was a common nobody! She, Anne Boleyn, who until yesterday, was Queen of England and the mother of the King’s legitimate and rightful heir, her precious daughter Elizabeth. She soon finds that she is not alone as her favorite court musician Marc Smeaton & her brother George have also escaped their graves. She is pleased to find Sir Thomas Wyatt mourning her in the Cemetary. He is incredulous at the sight of his dead lover, as he witnessed her execution and burial.

Anne is out for revenge. She had been wrongly charged, tried and convicted of treason with a witchcraft charge thrown in for good measure. She’s been sentenced to death by beheading (along with five innocent men including brother George and Marc Smeaton). Furthermore, her husband Henry VIII has thrown in her this bloody cold tower and he’s chasing HER lady-in-waiting Jane “the whore” Seymour around the castle. Plus the old, fat King has given ALL of Anne’s jewels to the little wench. Henry has it coming if he thinks he’ll be rid of Anne Boleyn so easy.

The day of the execution dawns and the King forgot to take his lithium because he’s decided that rather than behead her, the six finger witch will hang in

Tower Green. That will show her she’s just a common roll in the hay. Boring was more like it. Anne is brought to the Tower and promptly hung. The hangman throws her body in a shallow grave and throws some dirt over her and collects his 10 quid. Back at Westminster, Henry and Jane are dancing a reel and planning their nuptials.

However, as soon as the sun begins to set, Anne begins to feel an ache in her bones, and her neck really hurts. She realizes that she, Queen Anne of England has been thrown in a pauper’s grave without even a coffin. “I hope that hangman chokes on his 20 quid.” As she sits up in the dirt, she sees that her old pal Marc Smeaton is arising also, as well as her brother George. Marc and Anne look no worse the wear but George was always a delicate sort. They have to dispatch George back to “death” while they figure out what the HELL they are! Anne feels a delicious new power in her veins, but Marc is just in a jolly good mood. As they quickly exit St. Peter’s Vincula, they are shocked to see Sir Thomas Wyatt. He’s been holding a vigil at

Anne’s grave all day, on the edge of grief stricken breakdown. Needless to say, Sir Thomas is overjoyed that his love is well “undead”.

Anne begins to recognize her vast new power. Marc has some of her power, but not all.. With Sir Thomas as their human conduit, they ready plans for a campaign of terror against the King and his court.

As the Westminster “hauntings” begin, Anne concludes she must feed on more human blood than Tom is giving her and begins to stealthily attack a few nameless victims. Unfortunately, her first was a Sentry and she did not finish him off correctly so now she has created a superhuman beast. Problems, problems.These beings are wildly out of control so therefore a threat to innocent Englishmen. Plus, Tom and Anne got a little too lusty and now he’s fully turned. If she didn’t loathe her fat, rat husband, this would be a real bore.

And she’s deduced that Catherine of Aragon’s ghost is hanging around protecting people. Like a few of Anne’s would be victims.Like Jane Seymour. And Anne can’t see the Catholic witch but Cat can see Anne. Bugger!!Jane Seywhore managed to finally bear HVIII’s precious heir, which only increased Queen B’s fury til she heard thru the undead grapevine that darling Jane has gotten herself a fever and is dying. Hah! Thats what she gets for stealing someone else’s man.

BOLEYN TUDOR VAMPIRE IS A FUN BOOK AND RE-VAMP OF 16TH CENTURY HISTORY. It’s well worth the $2.99 Kindle price. tags: royal, tudor, wife, mistress

Anne, with a little help from Marc and Sir Thomas manages to wreak havoc at court and bring the King to the brink of insanity. The “Vampire” Queen becomes so blood thirsty that her love and ally her quest Sir Thomas makes it his mission to stop her forever.

I love historical fiction AND vampire tales, so I really enjoyed BOLEYN TUDOR VAMPIRE. Great read for all those who liked the zombie version of Sense & Sensability and the many other similar novels. I thought the author did a great job with the characters and the story. I look forward to trying other books from her ABAXAS series.

Introducing Longreads’ Best of WordPress

I think I’m going to go for it!

The WordPress.com Blog

Today we’re excited to launch a new series with Longreads, the storytelling community that recently joined the Automattic and WordPress.com Editorial family. And we need your help.

We’re looking for the best long-form stories over 1,500 words, across all of WordPress—a quest that will span 22% of the Internet. It will include work from undiscovered writers, as well as the authors and publishers you already know and love.

Help us find and share the best stories

Authors and publishers: When you post something great that’s over 1,500 words, use the longreads tag on your post so we can consider it. You can also share a link to the story on Twitter: Just reply to @Longreads or include #longreads in your tweet. (If your WordPress site is self-hosted, Twitter is still the best way to reach us.)

Readers: If you find something that you love, share it with us!…

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Damsels Not in Distress: Cassie-la Bows to “Princesses Behaving Badly” by Linda Rodriguez McRobbie

Is this book non fiction? Is there a Duchess named Fergie? Camilla? Truth is far more interesting than fiction.

Bibliomantics.com

Princesses Behaving Badly Linda Rodriguez McrobbiePrincesses Behaving Badly: Real Stories from History Without the Fairy-Tale Endings by Linda Rodriguez McRobbie (Advanced Reader Copy)
Release Date
: November 19, 2013
Genre: Nonfiction, history, princesses, humor, I’m still angry that Alice can’t be in the Disney princess line
Rating: 3.89 out of 5 stars

Summary: Not all princesses are of the prince-marrying and living happily ever after variety. Some of them would rather fight, kill and scheme to get their way rather than lay around hoping that one day an attractive man will show up and kiss them while they sleep. Within this book, author Linda Rodriguez McRobbie compiles true life stories of royalty who broke the Disney mold to show that not all princesses are created equal and that life is anything but a fairy tale.

As explained in its introduction, Princesses Behaving Badly seeks to destroy the myth of the “Princess Industrial…

View original post 664 more words

Damsels Not in Distress: Cassie-la Bows to “Princesses Behaving Badly” by Linda Rodriguez McRobbie

Bibliomantics.com

Princesses Behaving Badly Linda Rodriguez McrobbiePrincesses Behaving Badly: Real Stories from History Without the Fairy-Tale Endings by Linda Rodriguez McRobbie (Advanced Reader Copy)
Release Date
: November 19, 2013
Genre: Nonfiction, history, princesses, humor, I’m still angry that Alice can’t be in the Disney princess line
Rating: 3.89 out of 5 stars

Summary: Not all princesses are of the prince-marrying and living happily ever after variety. Some of them would rather fight, kill and scheme to get their way rather than lay around hoping that one day an attractive man will show up and kiss them while they sleep. Within this book, author Linda Rodriguez McRobbie compiles true life stories of royalty who broke the Disney mold to show that not all princesses are created equal and that life is anything but a fairy tale.

As explained in its introduction, Princesses Behaving Badly seeks to destroy the myth of the “Princess Industrial…

View original post 664 more words

Happy Mother’s Day!

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Happy Mother’s Day to every mom, grandma, mother-to-be, special aunt, wife (because having a husband is often like having a kid), puppy mama, and honorary mother out there. I hope you have a beautiful day surrounded by the people you love.

In the words of some of history’s most prolific writers:

“Whatever else is unsure in this stinking dunghill of a world a mother’s love is not.” ~ James Joyce

“God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers.” ~ Rudyard Kipling

“To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in all its perfect power.” ~ Maya Angelou

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Why I Still Need My Mom

No Cigarettes, No Bologna

mom_jess_wedding It was 7:00 the morning of Emma’s First Communion, and I already had been up for two hours prepping for the intimate gathering  sacramental bender for 65 people following the ceremony.

My mom arrived earlier in the week, and we had been prepping ever since. We sipped coffee as our eyes scanned the room, our list-making brains doing their thing.

“The succulents don’t look right in that planter – they aren’t raised up enough or something.” I mumbled quietly to myself. Or so I thought.

But in the time it took for me to park Phoebe in front of Frozen, my mother had abandoned her coffee and disappeared. I looked out the kitchen window and there she was, in my backyard wearing her nightgown and robe, gathering bricks from my garage. Sweet Jesus. She’s collecting bricks to raise up the succulents.

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My mom is a fixer, a do-er, a…

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Weekend sale! Get your beach read now!

In honor of spring…

and in the hopes that it sticks around…

Desperately Ever After is just $2.99 through the weekend!!

(That’s less than a grande latte at Starbucks!)

Click here for details

Summary & reviews:

Have you ever wondered how Cinderella would feel 10 years down the road, when her iconic ball gown no longer fit and she had four kids, a billion royal duties, and a husband who was never ever around?

Or what about Beauty? Once his curse broke, how long would it take for “Beast” to go right back to his old, wolfish ways?

Sprinkling women’s fiction with elements of fantasy, Desperately Ever After combines “Sex and the City,” “Desperate Housewives,” and the Brothers Grimm. At its core, the debut novel is about a group of ordinary women coming to terms with how their lives have turned out. They just happen to live in castles.

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